1. People will ask if you are married. If you’re not, they will look at you quizzically and ask why not. You’ll start to wonder why you are not married. Don’t worry, you’re not having a stroke. This will pass. You will be asked about your religion as well. If you don’t have one…get used to that quizzical look.
2. Waking up to your host-father sharpening a machete beats any alarm clock.
3. You don’t need a spoon to eat soup.
4. Drug-trafficking routes just happen to be the roads that get paved with government money. Pretty convenient, eh?
5. Riding a motorcycle down a rocky mountain road is in fact possible.
6. The after-hours gay clubs in Quetzaltenango are hoppin’.
7. Good luck buying a whole pack of cigarettes. People typically buy them one at a time.
8. Chicken buses are places to meet new friends, make balloon animals and get pick-pocketed.
9. Sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference between preachers and pen salesmen.
10. Always have duct tape, a knife, a notepad and a pen close at hand.
11. Tattoo vans really do exist. We’ll leave it at that.